I'd get a call from a vendor regarding a balance due. Like nothing I'd get my purse, whip out that Master Card and fork over a couple hundred bucks. It became routine. Between buying a house and the wedding we'd been throwing around money right and left and while it seemed so jaw dropping and overwhelming when we first started all this somehow I became desensitized.
While it is extremely important not to go overboard and spend outside your means I also don't think it makes sense to spend a dime at all if it's not at at least close to what you want. I'd rather spend 10k and love my wedding then to spend 5K be disappointed and feel regret about spending even that much because I didn't get much of what I really wanted. Even though there are moments when I feel that it is positively obscene to spend this much money on a party I have no regrets for these reasons:
- We really wanted a traditional wedding for ourselves and for our families. We wanted to celebrate this amazing moment with everyone. Weddings aren't free. We knew it wasn't going to be cheap. We knew we were going to be spending way more then we ever normally would on an event but we decided to do it anyways.
- We balanced budget with our vision. I know I did my very best on finding the best prices and getting what we could for our money. I shopped around and just said no to things that were beyond our reach financially. Even if it wasn't as elaborate as the wedding industry would have you believe it should be we stuck to what we can afford AND planned a wedding modeled after our vision of what we wanted our wedding to be.
- We did not go into debt. Everything was paid in cash and our wedding will not be hanging over our head financially at all. Had we not been able to do this I'm not so sure how comfortable I would be with having had a wedding but fortunately we were able to.
- Our wedding was something that I was proud of even on a budget. I wouldn't have it any other way. You can't half way do it once you make the decision to have a wedding. If I am going to ask people to travel cross country I want to plan an event to make it worth their while. Even if we could invite 80 guests inside the courthouse with the justice of the peace for a 15 minute ceremony for close to $0 dollars and call it a day I certainly wouldn't expect them to come so far just for that. This might be different for every bride.
- Our wedding brought family AND friends together.
There is something so special and sacred about a wedding that makes it important enough that people will do what it takes and come from afar just they can just to be a part of it. It's still not worth spending beyond your means but that alone is priceless and like our wedding a once in a lifetime occurrence. I am so glad it's an experience that I did not have to miss out on.